Film: Comic-Con 2010 - Yes Please/No Thanks

The pant-wetting, girly-screaming, toy-throwing, fan-basing N-Sync gig for nerds frenzy that is Comic-Con 2010 is in full flow in San Diego, where one person has apparently been "assaulted" with a ball point pen at a Resident Evil: Afterlife promo screening. One clever commentator pointed out that someone was probably just trying to do him a favour and save him from actually having to see said promo.

However, in amongst the odd women with serious daddy issues dressed as zombie schoolgirls and the obese dudes come as Watchmen sobbing tears of joy into their hefty bosoms at the mere SIGHT of Kevin Smith, there was actually some talk of movies, and as a fan of said movies (all of them of course), I wanted to try and reach into the great piles of sweaty man-children and see if I couldn't extract with clenched fist some evidence of what was due to hit our screens in the coming months/years. In doing this, I plan to evaluate whether to be excited or scared of the approaching blockbusters. SO, let's go and take our seats in Hall H:


1) Tron: Legacy
Has Jeff Bridges and Michael Sheen in it, as well as one of the most tantalising trailers I've ever seen. If it shoots in 3-D properly then it is the perfect vehicle for the format; action-packed, vivid and futuristic. Music by Daft Punk? Verdict: Yes please.

2) Salt
Angelina Jolie playing a set-up CIA agent called, hold your horses, SALT! She goes on the run. Liev Schrieber chases after her. It presumably all gets very exciting. But not for me, because Jolly Ange, scourge of the sub-continent adoption industry, gives me the heeby jeebies. Verdict: Too much Salt might give you a heart attack.

3) Megamind
Will Ferrel, Brad Pitt, Tina Fey and Jonah Hill all voice characters in this animated send up of the super hero movie in which a caped crusader kills his nemesis and has no-one left to battle. I'm happier to hear rather than see this cast on screen right now, but could this ever compete with The Incredibles? I very much doubt it. Verdict: One in one out.

4) Super
Unmistakeably similar in concept to Kick-Ass. Rainn Wilson plays a regular joe who decides, though he has no discernable powers, to become a super-hero and fight everyday robbers, muggers and general bad men. Too late is the cry. Verdict: That ticket's not valid anymore.

5) The Green Hornet
Seth Rogen? Action star? Really? Spends the whole trailer doing that surprised/stoned look he does and telling his cuddly asian sidekick to do some kung-fu? REALLY? Not my idea of fun. Only saving grace is that Michel Gondry is at the helm. But I don't think it's going to help. Verdict: Only if it's raining. And there's nothing else on.

6) The Other Guys
Will Ferrell (he's a busy little comedy tumble-dryer this one) and Mark Wahlberg in a slapstick romp about two not-so-good policemen who want desperately to be more like the Lethal Weapon-type partners the desk over. Trailer looks okay, as long as Ferrell can reign it the fuck in. But then when has that ever happened? (Stranger Than Fiction actually. See now I'm fighting with myself, that's not good). Eva Mendes and her lips are in it as well, which always helps. Verdict: Oh, go on then, but only because you asked nicely.

7) Cowboys and Aliens
Adapted from a comic of the same name, starring Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford (Indiana Jones 4, Harrison, SHAME ON YOU), Sam Rockwell and Paul Dano and is directed by Iron Man's Jon Favreau. Title speaks for itself, right? It's about cowboys fighting aliens. Isn't it? Yes, yes it is. Verdict: Yee-ha!

8) Paul
Comedy starring Simon Pegg and his man-sized third nipple Nick Frost (unfair joke, he's a good actor, though The Boat That Rocked was horse shit). Follows two British "nerds" who meet a sweary alien voiced by Seth bloody Rogen (leave us alone!). Directed by Greg Mottola, who made Superbad and Adventureland. Also has lots of other excellent comic actors in it. Verdict: Yeah, go on then, but are you SURE Edgar Wright can't do it?

That's all I'm going to go for right now. Safe to say there's not much to make me don my Evil Dead vest and head for San Diego. But then I haven't named one of my children C-3PO, so I might not fit in.